We about to have some FUN with this one.
I looked at the Video today and in it the person was confused about whether they should wait after having a civil ceremony til there white wedding to break there celibacy.
I truly don’t believe the woman asking the question was trying to play the man to get the wedding she wanted I think she ACTUALLY didn’t know because she said people in her family were telling her she should wait.
First thing – when you become married NO ONE has any say on what goes on inside your house but the two of you and the saying always goes. Don’t tell married peoples business to single or let them influence you.
You only listen to those in similar situation.
Now getting back to the point. I think the girl was young and had problem never been married before and didn’t know any better.
Second thing – It my belief that a court house wedding has been stigmatized. It’s not as talked about as the big white wedding. And 95% of the time most people getting married in those situations are trying to beat the brides stomach from showing.(if you catch my drift)
You know
Make a good look before you have a baby
Parents are pushing you into it
Not trying to be judged by others for doing something they shouldn’t outside of marriage
All leading back to people feeling like the wedding in a court house is very SHOT GUN, think about it it’s been very much a stigma around court house wedding feeling like it was something shameful about getting marriage at a court house.
And in some cultures they do it as a argument or contractual marriage that they get married in the court house. Which is even worse because it feels FORCED and like a prison sentence so everything around a court house ceremony feel IKY!!
The only time most people don’t think anything bad about a court house wedding is when it's a older couple
If there in their 40’s then they look at them as more of a second go round so they don’t need the “pomp and circumstance” or they just want to get married and not deal with the hassle
(these are people that are usually more mature then everyone else and didn’t care that no one came no matter that when they do reveal it to the family everyone’s going to be like “so why wasn’t I invited” it doesn’t matter to them.
But when you think “white wedding”
You get the Googlie eyes with the big HEARTS in them, you see wedding dress, venues, veils and (something old new barrowed blue) tuxes photo’s celebration.
And the fact of the matter is no one want’s to admit it but most times when you get married like that you do it for everyone else… it’s true, YES you want o share your day with the rest of your family but people make it bigger then everything when it isn’t the wedding is 1 day out of many in your life together, yes you should celebrate the mile stone but you should never make IT more important then your marriage
Because did you know you can get married and a GRAND ceremony and be divorced in 3 years WITHOUT paying off the wedding
You can also go through ALL that not actually be legally married
Without the COURT HOUSE documents beginning filed depending on where you got married “filed twice” you aren’t legally marred ANYWAY even after all that.
If you go over season and you get married you are married in that country but once you get back to the US and file the paperwork with documentation and signatures your not married in the us.
You know how many people wiggle their way out of marriage that way.
Yes the white wedding can be beautiful and all a woman ever dreamed of having but it is meaningless without the courts legalizing the marriage.
A wedding is only about the two people getting married, not the ideal of what it looks like… because your families involvement in your marriage ends at about the same place that your you say ‘I Do’
Sometimes we really need to ask ourselves are we having these big absorbent weddings with 300 guests (which let’s be honest 5, 10, 15 or 20yrrs from then you probably won’t even remember or care even came because you may have feel out of touch with them, friendship seasons ended, you didn’t even like them then you just invited them to not hear their mouth at EVERY family reunion for years to come about how they weren’t invited)
So the question is I think it might be better to have a court house wedding, or at the very least a civil ceremony between you both and hand full of witness in nice location together, perfect intimate and who was supposed to be there would be there and everyone would be happy but most importantly you two would be happy because you’re the ones going home to spend the rest of your lives together.
So when it comes to “Court House” vs “white wedding” I think the answer is clear… don’t you?
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